Thursday, September 25, 2014

50 Shades of Cray Cray

Note: I was inspired to write this blog post after reading Helene In Between's "Irrationally Angry" post. You should check it out. She's awesome.

Ok. So. I'm stressed and agitated about 90% of the time.

I'm angry and upset at everything.

Yes. I do know that I am pregnant and hormonal.

As I type this, while sitting on my couch, my two year old son is pushing and gently kicking his feet against my hip causing me to become annoyed and frustrated as my computer screen shakes with every push of his foot.

The smallest things can set me off into an angry fit. Whether it be my impatient toddler repeating what he wants like a broken record about 28394839 times before I respond--honestly you have to admire his tenacity because he is dedicated to get what he wants--or my husband's dislike of my craving for packaged apple pies, my frustration seems constant and never-ending.

So here are some things that really tick me off...

+ Yes, I'm still getting sick. I've went 9 days without getting sick... and it's the longest I've went throughout this entire pregnancy without having to hug the toilet. Unfortunately, I'm nauseated all the time still--at least for the most part. The only positive is that I'm not getting sick every day, though when my puke-o-meter decides to reset, I could get sick as many as 4-5 time a day. FML.

+ The Terrible Twos. WHY the EFF to the two's have to be so damn terrible? For the past month, my child has whined and cried--it feels like but I'm probably exaggerating--constantly. And some parents say the three's are worse. Lord help me. I need more patience.

+ Pedicures. I need one. I want one. I don't want to pay for one. Irrational... I know.

+ I'm only 22 weeks pregnant right now. Um, hello lower back pain already! And, my hips and pelvis hurt already. This kid sits so low I swear he could swat Klay away if he tried to--ahem--enter. Yeah is that TMI? Oh deal with it. At least you don't have a little person who is pressing his head against your bladder, making you hurl, and hate the idea of eating or cooking all at the same time. I already feel huge and uncomfortable, I'm just ready to be delivering this baby come January.

+ People who make me have to repeat what I say more than once. Just listen the first time. Or the second. But when I have to say it a third, I'm annoyed.

+ Heartburn. As it if it's not enough that I have a child inside of me making me get up to pee every 5 minutes, I also have heartburn 24/7. Never had heartburn? Just wait til you get knocked up. Matter of fact, when you buy your pregnancy test, you might as well grab a bottle of Tums.

+ My iphone. I'm over it. It messes up constantly. It's slow. Switching to android and I'm so ready for it, I can barely stand it.

+ Apple Pies. While all I crave seems to be the little packaged apple pies, I have to have a certain brand. Some of the other brands suck and the pies taste like poo, and for some reason the brand I want is not in any damn stores. Klay went to four different stores the other day searching for pies for his irrational spouse. If they had any of my brand, they would have only one left and it would be lemon. They don't even have them at Walmart. Seriously? Who the EFF is eating all these damn pies? And why is it so difficult to find them? Meanwhile, Klay gets concerned that I'm eating one to two a day. I know they are bad for me, but as much as I throw up food I pay for and cook, these pies make me feel better. #piequeen #donthate

+ Shopping with a toddler. Brody refuses to be in the buggy so he has to walk and be independent, but he doesn't listen and touches everything in the store. I'm like "Don't touch that. Put that back. Brody come here. No, we can't have candy." It's never ending. I discipline him, and sometimes it works and sometimes not so much. By the end of the trip, I'm mentally and physically exhausted. PS. F-U Halloween candy being on every damn aisle at Walmart.

+ Things breaking when you need them. From flat tires and messed up phones to cracked bathtubs and dead car batteries, it seems everything we own is breaking. My blood pressure is rising.

+ Slow cashiers. Just take your time scanning three items I wish to purchase which takes five minutes more than it should. It's not like this pregnant lady has to pee or anything.

I could go on and on, but pretty much this is just a bitch post. Sorry about that guys. I'm just not in a grand mood today. Maybe tomorrow will be better.

It'd be a lot better if I had a maid or assistant. If only I were rich...

At least this attractive beast comes home to me every day! Watch video. You'll laugh.

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Boy or Girl?

One of the most exciting things during your pregnancy is finding out if you're having a boy or a girl. For me, already having a boy, I feel like I'm a boy-mom at heart. I've never really been super girly, grew up as a tom-boy and I don't even know how to paint my toenails and couldn't braid my hair if I tried.

I mean most girls watched movies like Cinderella and Beauty and the Beast--princess movies--but my favorite movie was Beetlejuice.

I know. I suck at being a girl.

But needless to say, when you get pregnant, you have no choice on your baby's gender. It's all based on who's the fastest swimmer.

SO anyway, I had my second sono scheduled at 12 weeks. Since it was so early, but I was almost out of the first trimester, I was unsure whether or not I would be able to find out what we are having.

Everything I read online said at that time during your pregnancy, the boy and girl parts look pretty much the same. It wouldn't be until week 13 or so that they really start forming enough to be able to tell what it is.

But at the sono, the sonographer said she was 95% sure what we were having. Klay was unable to come to the sonogram because he was working, so I asked her to put the gender in an envelope for us to open together when he got home.

Little did I know that we'd have a surprise waiting for us in that envelope.

I was determined it was going to be a boy.
Klay thought it was a boy too.
And, we both actually wanted another boy. Plus we have everything for a boy.

But when I pulled out a pink card that said it was a girl, my mouth fell to the floor and my reaction was "oh shit."

I mean I'm an emotional mess about 95% of the time. Could you imagine adding another female like me to this household?

It would be batshit crazy.

Don't get me wrong; there are plenty of great things about having a girl. We would have one of each and experience both sides of the fence (boy and girl). Girls have the proms and the weddings and all of the fun dress-searching activities. I was a cheerleader (which is the only girly thing I really got into) and softball player growing up, so I'd love to do all of those things with a girl. But I feel like girls are more emotional than boys. I mean we are the ones that get a monthly gift once a month that puts us in a foul and funky mood.

Honestly Klay and I were a tad bit disappointed it wasn't a boy. But the sonographer did tell us that it' was so early, she could be wrong so "don't buy anything yet."

We told our families and everyone experienced that same reaction--shock--but some were especially excited it was a girl. I had to tell them they'd have to wait to purchase items for the baby until after our 20 week sono confirmed it.

Though I wasn't 100% sure it was a girl, my mind was certainly adjusting to the idea of having a girl. And when I was pregnant with Brody I had a ton of options for girls names and very little for boys. So I was excited that I felt it would be a lot easier to choose a name for a girl. Klay and I had a girl name picked out for about 7+ years or so and it's always stuck with us.

The more I thought about it, the more I adjusted to the idea of having a girl.

So here we are; I'm 20 weeks pregnant and had my sonogram yesterday.

The main thing we want is a healthy baby. With my constant nausea, my high blood pressure, anemia, and the low PAPP-A hormone, which could mean my placenta could start to give out and I could have this baby sooner than my due date, I just wanted this baby to be healthy.

And from the report from the specialist doctor I have to see regularly now (and have regular sonos), this baby is on the right path. Healthy looking spine, brain, heart etc. That makes me feel much much better! Check out this video that confirmed it!



8 weeks




Because of that 12 week sono, I wasn't going to be surprised to hear girl, but Klay and I saw the little boy parts and we were surprised once again!!

Now, back to the drawing board on boy names. This kid will probably be born with no name. Seriously. Boy names are hard! I found out I was having a boy when I was pregnant with Bro at 11 weeks (due to a blood test that's 99% accurate) and I didn't finalize his name until 27-28 weeks.

But we are so excited that everything looks to be on the right track for now. The specialist doctor reassured us that there is 85% chance everything will go OK and the placenta will stay strong til the end, and there is a 15% chance that it will start to weaken before I'm full term. That made me feel a lot better. And my doctors are monitoring me closely to make sure that everything goes as it should.

If only I could kick this nausea to the curb...

Because of all my sickness and issues this pregnancy, I have a feeling this boy is going to be TROUBLE! Only time will tell.

Until next time,

Thursday, September 04, 2014

How I found out I was pregnant...again

If you haven't read my first pregnancy stories, you should do so here and here. Because some of the things I say may confuse you had you not already read them.

Let me start off by saying this was just as much as a surprise as our first.

We weren't trying. We were definitely practicing, but we weren't trying to have a second child just yet.

Let me just jump right in.

Ok. So what was the tell-tell sign this time? Sore boobs. Late period. The usual.

I did pee a lot but I already pee a lot so not a huge difference there.

I'd honestly thought I was pregnant earlier this year, but it turned out I was just late or completely forgot when my last period was and I thought I was late, only I was really on-time.

Needless to say, because of that scare, I was pretty sure I was just thinking I might be pregnant and then it would turn out I was wrong... again. I remembered I had two pregnancy tests stashed away from earlier this year, so early Saturday morning on Memorial weekend, I got up before the boys and took the test.

I was thinking "take the test, it will say negative and you can relax."

What I wasn't expecting was for it to come back and say "Nah, bitch you pregnant." Ok it really didn't say that, but that's what it felt like.

I had the Clearblue tests that reads "pregnant" or "not pregnant". But after"pregnant" popped up on the tiny screen--and my heart fell into my stomach--a little timer on the side was still blinking like it wasn't finished calculating.

I sat there and waited.

"Maybe the 'not' will pop up," I thought.


Little did I know I purchased the test which calculates how far along you are. Once the timer quit blinking, "2-3 weeks" showed up on the screen...

I sat on the floor and stared at the floor.

Klay was clueless, asleep in our bedroom. This time, unlike the first, he had no idea I was taking a test so I was a little nervous about how he'd react.

The timing didn't seem quite right to be pregnant again, but I suppose it never does.

I decided to take the second test, just to be sure. I mean I know if it says you are, you are. And if it says you're not, you still could be, but I thought "just take the second one, might as well."

So, I did.

Same result.


I just sat and cried in disbelief. I just didn't feel I was ready.

I was trying to get back on track with losing weight and trying to find a job. And, this just complicates things again.

Plus, Klay and I had gotten into a little tiff the night before over something dumb like the dishes. Normally we hash things out before going to bed. It's kind of one of our "rules," we try not to go to sleep angry. But I was freaking tired and didn't feel like talking about the dishes so I fell asleep.

So I wasn't sure how he'd react the next morning.

Meanwhile, I tried to think of a clever way to tell him I was pregnant. So I decided to make breakfast and coffee before he got up and thought I'd write it on his coffee cup. Clever enough for short notice.

So I wrote "2nd White Baby on the way! Drink up!"

He got up when he heard me moving around pans in the kitchen.

The first thing he did was hug and kiss me--a sign to show me he'd moved on from the night before. I felt my shoulders relax with relief.

I made pancakes and had some fresh fruit on the side.

I had to tell him I made coffee and already had a coffee cup sat out for him. I turned it so the message I wrote on the cup was away from him.

But before that he asked me if I wanted coffee and I said "no." And then when it came time to eat,
I told him I'd eat in minute and that I wasn't that hungry.

And he picked up on the strange vibe I guess.

"What's going on with you? You don't want coffee or want to eat? Should I be worried? Did you poison my food?" he laughed, joking about our argument the night before.

"Well I do watch a lot of 'Snapped,' but I wouldn't poison your food, it would be too obvious," I said trying to play it off.

"I'll eat," I said. "Just don't give me those two pancakes on the top. Those are for you," I joked.

Since our kitchen table was still outside we were eating on the floor.

It took him about 45 minutes to notice the message on the coffee cup.

I was waiting to see how he'd react. I had my phone ready so I could grab and record when he finally noticed the message.

Since his first words were "WTF" when we found out I was pregnant with Brody, I was eager to hear the first words to come out of his mouth this time.

And, guess what? He didn't disappoint.



Only my husband.

I'd post photos and videos of this epic event, but unfortunately on Friday, my phone decided to stop working and I lost them all. No I didn't back up. I hate that shit. Takes forever. Those precious moments captured are lost forever I suppose. My fault. FML.