Thursday, May 08, 2014

Women Always Go To Bed Last

Every night, I'm the last one to pull back my covers and hop into bed.

The reason: I have to do 622782 million things before bed before I can go to sleep.

Meanwhile, Klay brushes his teeth, showers and settles into bed long before I hit the sheets.

This really effing bothers me. 

And, I'm not really sure why.

I literally look like this every time I see him in bed, snug as a bug in a rug.

Don't hate on my Buffy references.

Maybe it's because I always forget things I need before bed.

Meanwhile Klay lays in bed comfortably checking his phone, emails, FB or whatevs. And I'm still moving about trying to get everything together.

But here goes my nightly rundown:

First, I have to take off my makeup. 

I freaking hate this part of the day. I'm either taking off my make up or hopping in the shower. And on top of that I have to brush my teeth AND dry my hair if I wash it. UGH. #girlprobs

Second, I have to have a glass of ice water by the bed--every night.

Usually it's still full the next morning--usually--but on occasion I drink the whole thing. That also means more bathroom trips because my pea-sized bladder can't hold it until I wake up. How I feel every time I wake up during the night and have to "go"... #smallbladderprobs

Then, I finally get in bed relieved to finally lay down after doing my nightly cleansing rituals.

Only to realize I forgot something. Whether it's my phone, a favorite pillow, checking the thermostat, taking medicine or going to the bathroom, I'm up and down, up and down and in and out of the bedroom for about 30 minutes prior to bedtime. #neverfails #arielisthebestprincess

Thirty minutes later (and Klay's been snug in bed for a long time), I throw myself into bed tired, exhausted and I'm still probably going to have to get up to pee again.

As soon as I hit the sheets, Klay looks over at me and then I get "the look." He probably thinks it looks like this...

BUT he really looks like this... 

Two minutes later... 
I kid, I kid. 

But later... 

I finally get settled in bed, but then I'm all...

Meanwhile, Klay's already...

And I'm back at looking like this again...

Meanwhile in my brain...

The nighttime struggle is real ya'll. 

Ya feel me?